Thursday, January 31, 2013

The Struggles of Hormone Imbalance

Last Thursday I started taking hormones. I am basically starting from ground zero with having no hormones in my system for four months. My doctor started me on the lowest dose of estrogen and what I think is the lowest dose of provera. My emotions have been all over the chart. I feel like I've been on a roller coaster ride this past week. I've been sad to the point of crying for two or three hours, edgy or irritable, my heart feels like its racing a lot, and now I have a bit of insomnia again. Plus, men just don't get *it*, what I'm going through. Okay, my honey says that he does but he's clueless. I know this because of my husband's actions and words. It would be nice if I could just wave a wand and get back to being my old self, feeling normal. I guess I'm just going to have to give this time, more time than I thought.

I woke up this morning at about 3:30 a.m. and wasn't able to get back to sleep so I've been surfing the internet, praying and writing in my journal. The Lord sent me to Psalm 147. I am pretty sure that God is saying that He will heal me, heal my wounds and hurts inside of me. Plus, I think that God was saying to me that He will help to restore me to normal, or even better than my old normal. I praise God for his being with me as I go through my struggles. In addition I am so thankful to all the wonderful family and friends who have been caring for and supporting me while I go through such distress and hurts.

Praise for Jerusalem’s Restoration and Prosperity.

147 [a]Praise [b]the Lord!
For it is good to sing praises to our God;
For [c]it is pleasant and praise is becoming.
The Lord builds up Jerusalem;
He gathers the outcasts of Israel.
He heals the brokenhearted
And binds up their [d]wounds.
He counts the number of the stars;
He [e]gives names to all of them.
Great is our Lord and abundant in strength;
His understanding is [f]infinite.
The Lord [g]supports the afflicted;
He brings down the wicked to the ground.
Sing to the Lord with thanksgiving;
Sing praises to our God on the lyre,
Who covers the heavens with clouds,
Who provides rain for the earth,
Who makes grass to [h]grow on the mountains.
He gives to the beast its food,
And to the young ravens which cry.
10 He does not delight in the strength of the horse;
He does not take pleasure in the legs of a man.
11 The Lord favors those who fear Him,
Those who wait for His lovingkindness.
12 Praise the Lord, O Jerusalem!
Praise your God, O Zion!
13 For He has strengthened the bars of your gates;
He has blessed your sons within you.
14 He makes [i]peace in your borders;
He satisfies you with the [j]finest of the wheat.
15 He sends forth His command to the earth;
His word runs very swiftly.
16 He gives snow like wool;
He scatters the frost like ashes.
17 He casts forth His ice as fragments;
Who can stand before His cold?
18 He sends forth His word and melts them;
He causes His wind to blow and the waters to flow.
19 He declares His words to Jacob,
His statutes and His ordinances to Israel.
20 He has not dealt thus with any nation;
And as for His ordinances, they have not known them.
[k]Praise [l]the Lord!

Here is a Scottish Psalter I found.


Opus #6 said...

Gosh, T, I'm sorry to hear that it has taken 4 months to get this started. Sudden removal of hormones would throw anybody into a tailspin. Even and especially a man.

I am praying that you find balance in your life, with peace and happiness.

Doom said...

Uhrm, you certainly suffer... the nature of the woman. Bless that the fruit of thy loin will not suffer the serpent. The rest of it? I can't quite tolerate the music but I love the notion. I'm guessing it is a hormonal thing. *hugs*

No, I know the feminine like few men. It's just that, when God called me, I veered... right?

Never worry. While I argue and debate and can't stand the feminine nature... I truly cherish it, outside of me. Just, please, not so much? xoxoxoxo :p Be blessed, daughter of man. Oh, and I will pray for you, and my... wayward ways! May God smile on both of us for our silliness and even seeming hardships.

Opus #6,

I thought you were, well, on... urhm... our side! *splitter!* :p

Teresa said...

Thanks so much for your prayers Opus. It took that long because I needed to make sure all the endo was gone. If it wasn't the hormones would have made the endo grow and I would be back to dealing with pain.

Thank you for your thoughts, prayers, and hugs Doom.

God Bless you both.

Opus #6 said...

Doom, you weren't supposed to see that comment, lol! Whatever are you doing in these parts?

T, that makes perfect sense. It must have been difficult for you. Extra hugs.

Teresa said...

Thank you very much for the extra hugs Opus. There much appreciated. Yes, it has been hard. I struggled a lot after my surgery til I guess Dec., thought that I had turned the corner. Maybe I had. But when I started taking the hormones about a week ago I felt like I had been hit by a mack truck or something. I still have hot flashes, hands shake, and have trouble thinking so I know I have a bit more to go before my doc figures out the proper balance for me.

God Bless my friend.

Leticia said...

I hope you feel better soon. I am sorry you have to suffer so much.

Teresa said...

Thank you Leticia. I like to think since I've been through a bit of purgatory or hell here on earth than that will be less time I will spend in purgatory after dying.

Always On Watch said...

Hormone imbalance is the pits!

Been there, done that. For quite a while, I was literally out of control.

Mafalda Cramer said...

I'm sorry to know that you feel no one understands your struggle. Even so, I can affirm that you're lucky because you have friends and family who are supporting you through this ordeal. That regimen is normal, and sadly, all that can be done at the moment is to wait until your hormones stabilize. It's been three months now since you posted this, so I hope everything is starting to look up. Stay strong, Teresa. Mafalda Cramer